


Hydra Dreamscape

by RainbowArches



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-31
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-04 14:47:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3072044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowArches/pseuds/RainbowArches
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a snake infestation in this house of cards, and whose cards are these anyway?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hydra Dreamscape

**Author's Note:**

> Just as the title suggests, this fic is a dreamscape; not really crack, not entirely serious. It's important to know that going in, or it'll probably sound really ridiculous.

This was important. She would never get this house built if people kept interrupting her. When would her agents learn, they didn’t need her to sign off every single little thing. Just take your lunch break, just go to the bathroom, just shoot the terrorist, and if one of the lab worms has escaped, find it. This wasn’t grade school; honestly.

She held her breath as she started the second layer of her house of cards, and did her best to ignore Zola’s pompous, high-pitched lecture about… something. The digestive system of snakes? How was that relevant to carpentry? That wasn’t the assignment she’d given him. How long had he been standing there anyway?

Her hands didn’t tremble a bit as she delicately stacked two cards against each other, a neat little hut on top of the roof of the first floor. The trick was to trust the deck, and the house would build itself.

“Those are my cards,” Zola stated matter-of-factly.

“Why would I play with your cards?”

“Well, you are.”

“They can’t be. This is my house.”

“It’s not a house yet. And that is my deck. For all you know, you could be building a prison or a zoo.”

“As you say, it’s your deck. This is your prison or zoo.”

“Very true, ma’am.”

She always hated the way he said ma’am. It sounded like a joke she wasn’t in on. She stacked the cards higher easily, but as she did so, her chair began to swallow her up, and the desk was soon too big for her, and the house was getting too high for her to reach. No matter. The deck stayed full, no matter how big she built the house.

Zola reached over and plucked the deck from her hands. He shuffled through it, eliminating some of the cards. “You can’t use the queens.”

“But they’re all queens.”

“No. They only appear so. Tis a trick of the light.”

“But I need them for my castle.”

“You cannot build a castle out of my deck,” he said, tossing card after card away, not one hitting the floor. “Here you go. You may use these.” He handed the deck back.

She shuffled through hundreds and hundreds of jokers. “These are all jokers.”

“What do you think you’ve been using all this time? They’re all yours.” He smiled as though letting her in on a joke. She didn’t get it.

“This is your deck.”

“Yes.”

She stacked a couple on the roof, and the house toppled down. She tried again. They collapsed. “They won’t listen,” she snapped, glowering at them.

“You are not commanding them properly.” Zola stepped forward and began stacking the jokers on top of each other with ease, hissing happily.

She sighed. “Well, they’re your cards. Excuse me; I must find my queens.” She stood and left her office to join busy buzzing and bustling outside, nearly bumping into Pierce who was standing just outside her door. “Morning, ma’am.” His usual omniscient smirk was plastered on his face. In his arms, Nick strained against the blanket he was wrapped up tight in, clumsy fists trying to punch it away from his eyes. Peirce bounced him gently, trying to either soothe him or encourage him, Peggy couldn’t tell.

“How many times have I told you not to lurk outside my door?”

“Sorry, ma’am.” His smirk didn’t fade.

Peggy fell into a business-like stride, Peirce falling into a militant step next to her. She didn’t know where they were headed, but they were headed there with great purpose. “Who’s that?” she asked, gesturing to Pierce’s infant.

“Agent Fury, of course.”

What was with that tone? Why did everyone sound like she was missing the obvious? “No, agent Fury is in my office, building a house.” Of course he was; she’d put him there. Why was everyone so full of nonsense today?

“He was, but I needed his help with my house.”

She regarded the whining bundle in his arms skeptically. His struggling was causing all the queens to fall to the floor.  Or were they jokers? “And is he? Helping, I mean?”

“Oh, yes, he’s doing a marvelous job.”

Nick started to wail.

“Perhaps you could return him to me,” she suggested. “I need him for my castle. His office is a mess.”

Pierce laughed. “A little late for that, isn’t it?”

She frowned at him. Oh, whatever. She had no time for this. She pushed through the nearest door and found herself in the lab, though she could have sworn it was the cafeteria. The walls and lights were glaringly white. It put her on edge. The door closed behind her with a hiss. The snakes eyed her blandly from within their cases, but did not make a sound. She could hear birds screeching, though she could not see any. She joined Howard where he was tickling one of the snakes with a beautiful long brown feather.

“Why are you feeding my agents to these snakes?”

She appraised her with an affronted, startled look. “I would never!” he exclaimed, not letting up with the feather. The snake watched them with big, owlish eyes behind thick round glasses.

“Then how do you explain the screeching? Or the fact that all these snakes look like Zola?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You know I only want the best for everyone.”

She stared at the bandages covering his face and hands. “Looks like he’s been making dinner out of you, too.”

He frowned at her. “What do you mean?”

The Zola snake latched onto the feather with his fangs. Howard tried to tug it away from him.

“Let it go, or he’ll swallow your hand,” said Peggy.

“He won’t do that. I’m his boss.”

“Do you know how tight it feels to be swallowed by a snake? Because I do.”

“I need my feather. The world is at stake.”

“Don’t worry. I have hands and feathers.”

“Oh.” Howard let go of the feather. His finger was bleeding quite a bit, but it was still attached to his hand, thankfully. Zola snake hissed at them.

“I will take my tea break now,” she informed him.

“Of course. You don’t need to sign off.”

“Yes, I know,” she snapped. What a zoo this was.

She found Steve and Gabe in the cafeteria. “Which of you will pour me tea?”

“I would like to,” said Steve. “I never learned how.” He looked sad.

“I got it, don’t worry,” Gabe said, as he expertly brewed the perfect cup of tea. “Ma’am,” he said, handing it to her with a flourish.

“Ah, thank you, my love.” She held it up and inhaled. “Mmmm. Just right.”

“Sorry, I forgot the sugar,” Steve said nervously.

“It’s in the lab, with Howard.”

“May I sit with you?” Gabe asked.

“Of course. You don’t have to ask.”

“I couldn’t remember whose turn it was,” he explained, pulling up a chair. “Steve is very precise about turns.”

“Steve? But he’s in the lab with Howard.”

“Has anyone seen my shield?” Steve asked. He looked fretful.

“It’s in the lab, with Howard.”

She took a sip of her tea, and paused. Glenn Miller was playing. “I wish they’d play music we could see.”

“He’s not bad though,” Gabe said.

“Oh? Where is he then?”

“I’m sure you’ll find him eventually. Don’t let your tea get cold.”

“Tea doesn’t get cold. It’s tea.” She took another sip. Mmm.

Steve came bursting through the doors excitedly. “Zola has eaten Howard’s hand!” he exclaimed, looking absolutely indignant.

“Deal with it then. I’m busy.”

Steve tilted his head, confused.

Peggy rolled her eyes. “Oh, never mind. Let me.”

She left the cafeteria and found herself having to sidestep hundreds of snakes to get back to the lab. She looked around for one of her agents, but there were none. Now she had an infestation to add to her list of things to deal with. “I only wanted a short tea break.” She gasped as one of them bit her ankle. Enough was enough. She looked around for the culprit, and stomped on its head.

She woke up with a start. Nick was shaking her shoulder.

“Ma’am? Are you alright?”

“What? Oh, yes. I’m fine.” She scrubbed at her eyes and tried to work the kinks out of her neck.

“I thought you called in sick.”

“Why would I do a thing like that?” She sneezed.

“Because you’re sick. Don’t worry; I won’t tell anyone.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “I trust you’re here to hand in that pile of overdue paperwork.”

“Yes.” He dropped it on her desk without ceremony. “But promise me you’ll wait until you can actually see the damn stuff before you approve any of it. Oh, and the WSC is on the line. Want me to take it?”

“Sure. Might as well let you get some practice in.”

He winked and left her to her pretend rest.


End file.
